If Music Be The Language Of Love
by whitecrossgirl
Summary: Inspired by kbrand5333's story 'Songs to Dance' here are ten random song-inspired Arthur/Gwen stories which will range from canon-era stories to modern AU's.
1. Dear Diary

**AN: I was inspired to do this mainly by the amazing work created by kbrand5333 and her series of song-fics in 'Songs to Dance'. I own none of these songs; all I'm trying to do is relieve my boredom. I'm alternating between canon-based stories, modern AU's and I might chuck in a Dark!Arthur simply because I can. So enjoy; I hope.**

_**Dear Diary**_

_**What am I doing?**_

_**He is dumb and a child**_

_**But then once in a while**_

_**He'll say something.**_

_**Dear Diary**_

_**We were just friends.**_

_**But somehow that all changed**_

_**My whole life rearranged**_

_**What is this feeling?**_

_**What is this feeling?**_

'**Dear Diary'-The Parselmouths. **

Gwen was usually everyone's confidant. The knights, Merlin, Arthur as well as other servants usually turned to her whenever they needed a friendly ear and a kind heart to sooth their troubled minds and offer solutions to their problems. Gwen listened to their problems and did the best she could to try and help them through it. However even the confidant needed a confidant. For Gwen, this was the book Morgana had once given her a lifetime ago.

Unlike the majority of people, Gwen could read and write; as children she and Elyan sat in on Leon's lessons whenever they accompanied their mother to her work of serving Leon's mother Lady Abigail and whenever she worked with Morgana, the ward always ensured that Gwen took part in her lessons. Indeed it was oftentimes the only way Morgana would learn. Morgana gave Gwen the empty book as a birthday present and it had taken Gwen a long time to even dare trace letters onto the crisp white pages and only began writing in it whenever Tom had been killed and Gwen needed somewhere and something to vent her sorrow, anger and regrets about her father without the fear of the words being used against her.

Nowadays her diary was the place where she wrote down everything from recounts of their various adventures to her private thoughts about her friends and her fears concerning Morgana and their futures now that everything between them had changed. It was also the only record of her conflicting and developing feelings for Arthur. The earliest entries were used by Gwen to reveal her private feelings concerning the arrogant prince who bullied Merlin and seemed to exist to annoy everyone before a few scribbled entries timed around whenever he had been bitten by the Questing Beast and revealed her fears that Arthur was about to die and her steady conviction that he would pull through. Over time the entries changed.

Their first kiss was recorded in an almost dream-like tone of voice; Gwen had still been unable to believe it had happened. Arthur had kissed her. Prince Arthur had kissed her!

The retelling of her kidnapping at the hands of Hengist's men revealed not only the conflict between her feelings for both Arthur and Lancelot during her imprisonment but also her anger at Lancelot for leaving them and her certainty that she and Arthur could never be.

The Vivian incident had been recorded on tear-stained paper as she vowed to never let anyone hurt her like that again.

Morgana's yearlong disappearance, which drew them closer together out of fear and worry for their beloved friend also featured scattered updates about their growing romance. These entries also allowed her to voice her private beliefs that Morgana was not all she appeared to be whenever she returned as well as the retelling of embarrassing incidents such as the Goblin's escape; the conflict presented whenever Elyan had been captured by Cenred as she and Elyan became pawns in his power game against the Pendragon's not to mention the dramatic recount of Uther's discovery of their relationship.

Yes Gwen's diary was her sole confidant and comfort. A place she could present the private inner working of her mind. It was her diary who first learnt that Gwen had fallen in love with Arthur. It comforted her broken heart and conflict between rational and love. It recorded every thought and emotion created by her and Arthur's relationship. Every how and why. Every where and when. Every who and what. Gwen's diary recorded it all. It contained information that nobody else knew. It contained her deepest secrets and fears and Gwen made sure to hide it somewhere that she was certain that nobody would find it.

"Where is it?" Gwen muttered as she rummaged under her bed through the small crate where she kept her clothes, fumbling for a smooth hard surface which didn't come into contact with her fingers. It was gone! Gwen pulled out the crate and emptied it but it wasn't there. She ran her broom underneath her bed but came up empty handed. As Gwen looked around the small house she called home; Elyan stood in the doorway grinning triumphantly.

"Looking for this?" Elyan asked, holding the book out tauntingly.

"Give it back Elyan." Gwen replied; silently praying that he hadn't read it.

"Come get it," Elyan offered but as Gwen walked towards him, Elyan turned and ran. Gwen gave chase until they reached the courtyard of the castle where Merlin and the other knights were sitting on the steps. Elyan pushed his way towards his friends and they childishly began playing Keep Away with the diary. Gwaine threw it to Merlin who missed the catch and the book landed on the steps just as Arthur was walking down them. Arthur picked up the open book and scanned the first page of writing before anyone could stop him.

_Arthur always tells me that he loves me. How can he? I'm a servant. I-I honestly feel that I don't deserve him. What could I offer him that a beautiful noblewoman could not offer him ten-fold? He always talks about our future together. How we could someday marry, possibly have children and rule Camelot together as king and queen. But how can we be together when the whole world is against us? I shudder to think how Uther would react if he ever found out about us. Sometimes I think it would have been better if we'd never met but every time I have one of those thoughts; I think about Arthur. How it felt the first time he kissed me. I think about his courage and loyalty and how he and Merlin can always make me smile with their antics. I think about the arrogant child he was, the man he became and the wonderful king I know he'll someday be and I am reminded of just how much I really do love him. _

Arthur snapped the book shut and walked to Gwen who was hanging her head with a hand pressed against her forehead as she now wished for the ground to open her up and swallow her whole. This had to be one of the most embarrassing things to have ever happened to her. Arthur pressed the diary into Gwen's hands before he took her face in his hands and kissed her for everyone to see. Just like he had after the battle and she returned to Camelot with the knights.

"I'm the one who doesn't deserve you." Arthur whispered as they broke apart. Gwen clutched her diary to her chest as she left the courtyard and that evening after listening to the men's apologises, Gwen wrote a few more lines in her diary before she hid it in a new location away from prying eyes once more.


	2. Home

_**Let me go home**_

_**I'm just too far**_

_**From where you are**_

_**I wanna go home**_

_**Let me go home**_

_**It'll all be alright**_

_**I'll be home tonight**_

_**I'm coming back home**_

'_**Home'-**_**Michael Buble**

Lance Corporal Arthur Pendragon joked around with his comrades as they returned from one of their patrols to Camp Bastion. He and his mates were halfway through their second tour of duty in Afghanistan. Arthur had seen some terrible things in his time in Afghanistan but he also held a passionate belief in doing his duty for his country and for the people of Afghanistan as they fought to defeat the Taliban. As they ate dinner, the conversation turned once again to their loved ones back home. Leon had a girlfriend as had Lancelot. Percival had a fiancé and Gwaine was happy enough living the single life. Out of the five of them, Arthur was the only one who was married.

"What about your woman Pendragon?" Gwaine asked.

"I was talking to her on Skype the other night. Any word of when any of us are getting leave?" Arthur asked.

"Nothing yet, weird to think you could get homesick for British rain." Leon commented jokingly. Aside from the obvious danger of being soldiers in Afghanistan; the harsh Afghani sun burnt them on a daily basis and to those who grew up in rainy Britain and Ireland in Gwaine's case it took some getting used to.

"When I go home all I'm thinking of is a proper pint of Guinness in my local back in Dublin." Gwaine commented fondly. As the men chatted and joked, their commanding officer Tristan summoned the men to announce the names of soldiers who were due for leave within the next few weeks. Once the names had been announced, Arthur hung his head and went to make a phone call.

"Excuse me, Mrs Pendragon?"

Gwen looked up from the homework she was marking while her class worked on English worksheets based on nouns and looked at the Year Six pupil who was standing awkwardly in the doorway.

"What is it?" Gwen asked.

"There's a woman in the office here to see you." The boy replied. Gwen looked at her students and knew better than to leave twenty seven-year-olds alone and turned back to the boy.

"Can you take her up here and then return to class?" Gwen asked. The boy nodded and Gwen trying to control the sudden burst of butterflies in her stomach. She couldn't get ahead of herself. It was probably Morgana dropping into the school for some reason, Morgana was impulsive like that. There was no point worrying over nothing. As she paced around the classroom pretending to observe the children's worksheets and offering corrections, the pupil returned and Gwen glanced at the doorway before turning to her class.

"I'm just stepping outside for a moment. I'll just be outside the door so continue with your work and I don't want to hear any talking." Gwen said as she walked out the door. Naturally before the door had even shut, she could hear the babble of children chattering and messing around. Gwen stepped into the corridor and turned to see her sister in law who was looking uncharacteristically serious.

"Morgana what's wrong?" Gwen asked_. Please let nothing terrible have happened to Arthur, please God I'm begging you. _

"Arthur rang me last night when you were at Elyan's. He hasn't been granted leave until the end of his tour." Morgana replied.

"But he was due to come home at the end of the month." Gwen reminded. They had worked it out that Arthur was expected leave around the date of their third wedding anniversary. Morgana shook her head and shrugged her shoulders.

"What else can he do? I'm sorry I had to be the one to tell you but he couldn't get through to you last night and well, you know." Morgana trailed off, unsure of how to add 'we don't know if he'll get himself killed someday soon'. Gwen nodded and attempted to hide her disappointment and Morgana wrapped her arms around her best friend and sister-in-law and hugged her tightly. As they broke apart Morgana looked around the corridor and grinned at Gwen.

"Is old Mr Monmouth still the principal here?" Morgana asked.

"You know he is, he wouldn't retire even if he wanted to." Gwen replied with a wan smile. They had all attended Excalibur Primary school; she, Morgana, Arthur and Merlin. Four lifelong friends who had grown up together. While Gwen now taught Year Two, Morgana was a social worker and Merlin was a doctor. Arthur had joined the army whenever he turned eighteen, had served in Iraq and was currently deployed in Afghanistan.

"Interesting," Morgana nodded to herself. "I'll see you later, still coming round for dinner on Sunday?"

"And miss Merlin's roast dinner? I think not." Gwen replied as she returned into the classroom and Morgana slipped down the corridor towards the office.

The next evening Gwen was curled up on the sofa lazily surfing the internet whenever she saw that someone was contacting her on Skype. Gwen quickly answered the call and Arthur's grinning face appeared on her laptop screen.

"Hi Guinevere," Arthur smiled.

"Hello yourself," Gwen smiled. He was here, he was safe. For now. "Morgana told me that you couldn't get leave."

"I know, Gwaine got my spot and for what? For him to go about Dublin and get wasted." Arthur commented shaking his head.

"Hey beautiful!" Gwaine called as he appeared over Arthur's shoulder. Leon, Percival and Lancelot also appeared on her screen and shouted their hellos. Gwen couldn't help but laugh. She had met Arthur's friends and she knew that they were funny and friendly men who loved messing around and were clearly good friends to Arthur. Even Arthur was trying to hide a grin as he tried to get his friends to leave them alone.

"Come on lads, I'm trying to talk to my wife, leave it!" Arthur insisted.

"Alright, we'll see you soon." Lancelot smiled at Gwen.

"Bye Gwen," Percival added.

"Here add me on Skype for whenever the princess here bores you. My username's-" Gwaine began but Leon clapped a hand over his mouth and smiled at Gwen.

"Ignore him, he's just jealous that no girl's ever liked him. See you!" Leon commented.

"Bye boys, stay safe." Gwen advised.

"We will," the men replied as they left Arthur and Gwen to their privacy. They looked at one another before laughing.

"They're a funny group." Gwen commented.

"They drive me mad sometimes but they're the best friends I've ever had. Except for you, Merlin and Morgana of course." Arthur replied.

"Thanks. I wish you were coming home. I miss you and I worry about you all the time." Gwen confessed. It was more than just worry. Every news bulletin that announced that a soldier had been wounded or killed had Gwen on tender hooks until the soldier's name was revealed and she could breathe again. Every time the phone rang or there was a knock on the door, fear bubbled in the pit of her stomach and panic threatened to control her mind due to her fear that she was receiving That Phone call or That Knock on the door. The one that every person with a loved one fighting in a war dreaded to receive. The one that told them that their loved one was coming home but in a flag-draped coffin.

"I know but we can't do anything about it. I'll see if I can arrange for some leave soon. Promise," Arthur reassured with a smile.

"Alright, how are you all getting on?" Gwen asked.

"Can't really complain and the job has to be done. I am sorry I couldn't get home but listen to me, no matter where I am or what I'm doing, I'll always be thinking of you."

"I'm always thinking about you," Gwen said with a smile as Arthur stifled a yawn.

"Got to head to bed now; I'm on foot patrol tomorrow morning with Lancelot and Percival." Arthur explained.

"Be careful," Gwen advised.

"Yes Mum," Arthur quipped with a grin. "I love you."

"I love you too." Gwen said honestly as they signed off. Gwen looked around the living room before her gaze fell on the framed photograph of her and Arthur on their wedding day on the mantelpiece. Gwen couldn't deny it was tough being an army wife. It was hard juggling a day to day life with the constant fear that Arthur could be killed at any moment hanging over her head. She was lucky therefore to have her family's support. Morgana, Merlin, Elyan and Uther worried about Arthur too and none of them even wanted to consider the possibility that Arthur wouldn't make it back from Afghanistan. As Gwen looked at the picture; her in her white dress and Arthur in his uniform she could only hope that he would be alright.

A few weeks later in Camp Bastion, those who had been allocated leave were packing their belongings up, chatting to friends and making phone calls to loved ones informing them of the approximate time of their arrival back on home soil. Arthur had managed to get himself onto one of the few computers on base and briefly talk to Merlin and Morgana before signing off. He still had his duties to do and couldn't afford to waste time. At six pm the soldiers piled into the trucks which would take them out of Camp Bastion and on the first part of the long journey home.

That same afternoon in England after the pupils had headed home; Gwen was cutting out and pinning up the artwork done that afternoon by her pupils who were currently learning about undersea life for science whenever there was a knock on the classroom door. Gwen jumped off the chair and crossed the classroom to let the principal into the classroom.

"What's wrong Geoffrey?" Gwen asked, she still sometimes got nervous around Mr Monmouth, the principal had a way of making Gwen feel like she was seven years old again and about to get in trouble for roofing a football.

"Nothing's wrong, there's a special assembly being held tomorrow for the pupils and it came to us at short notice. I'm just letting you and the other teachers know now." Geoffrey explained.

"Assembly? What about?" Gwen asked curiously.

"Just something for the students, nothing to be concerned about. It will take place after break time and shouldn't last too long." Geoffrey explained.

"Ok, I'll inform my students tomorrow." Gwen replied as the principal left the room and she returned to pinning the pictures to the wall. It was a bit unusual; Mr Monmouth was always extremely organised about things like this; it had even been a running joke since her Excalibur days about the principal's need to have everything perfect and organised. Special assembly's had to be planned weeks in advance and the teachers informed as soon as possible. A last minute one was not a common occurrence at Excalibur. Gwen shrugged her shoulders and kept pinning pictures of dolphins, starfish, crabs and a few mermaids to the wall before gathering some extra paperwork and heading home.

The next morning Gwen's mind drifted to what she had been doing on that day three years prior. Half eleven, she would have been getting her hair and make-up done while her stomach clenched with excitement and nerves. Gwen glanced out the window, wondering where and what Arthur was doing at that moment as her class returned in from their morning break. Gwen silenced them quickly and the students piled into their seats.

"Ok we have to go down to the assembly hall now for a special assembly. Come on, quickly." Gwen instructed as she led the students down to the filling assembly hall. The pupils were being sat in rows on the floor from the reception class to the Year Six students and the noise generated by a hundred-odd pupils in the one room echoed off the walls. As she got her class organised, Gwen looked around the hall for a clue as for what was going on. She noticed Nimueh fixing the projection screen and connecting the projector to a laptop. They must be showing the children a film or something. Finally all the pupils were settled in and Mr Monmouth stood at the front of the hall. It wasn't just the teachers and pupils in the hall, the classroom assistants, the two work experience students and even the dinner ladies were loitering in the hall for the assembly.

"Good morning everyone. Today we have a special treat; we've been able to get a very special and brave hero who wishes to pass on a special message to one of you. Can anyone guess who it is?" Mr Monmouth asked.

"Superman!"

"Batman!"

"Harry Potter!" Various voices suggested various heroes from comics, TV shows and films and Mr Monmouth shook his head and held up his hands for silence.

"Actually this person is a real hero, he's fighting for our country in Afghanistan and he's here now." Mr Monmouth replied as a Skype contact piped up and Nimueh pressed the accept button. Gwen's hands flew to her mouth as Arthur's grinning face appeared on the projection screen and she stepped forward to get closer to the screen. Gwen was so focused on Arthur that she didn't notice some of her colleagues producing cameras or their phones to record this assembly.

"Hi everyone, my name's Arthur Pendragon and I'm married to Mrs Pendragon and today is actually our wedding anniversary so I just wanted to surprise my lovely wife Guinevere because I couldn't get home. How are you?" Arthur asked Gwen.

"Better for seeing you, I can't believe you arranged this. How?" Gwen asked.

"Merlin, Morgana and Elyan helped." Arthur replied through the distorted screen. "The signal's quite bad my end, can you still hear me?"

"Yes, I wish you could have come home." Gwen replied. She should have realised that Elyan, Merlin and Morgana had been acting strange but she had been so upset with Arthur being unable to get his leave that she had barely focused on little else.

"I know, I just want you to do one thing for me," Arthur said as the screen jerked around as though the computer was about to fall or something.

"What's that?" Gwen asked but before Arthur could reply the screen went blank and Gwen and the students were staring at a blank desktop image. Gwen stared disappointedly at the screen and didn't notice the doors opening or the figures entering the hall. The leader was holding a laptop under his arm and two others were following with their own cameras. The fourth was still wearing his camouflage clothing and he studied the woman who still had her back to him.

"Turn around."

Gwen spun on the spot and pressed her hands over her mouth in shock as tears sprung to her eyes. She should have known! Arthur was standing with Merlin, Elyan and Morgana who were grinning as the latter two held up their cameras. Gwen ran down the hall, half-blinded by tears, jumped into Arthur's open arms and buried her face in his shoulder as everyone began applauding. This was real, he was here! He was home! Gwen removed her face from his shoulder and kissed Arthur to loud wolf whistles and louder cheering. As they broke apart, Arthur thumbed the tears from Gwen's face and she stared at his tanned, handsome and grinning face.

"How are you," Gwen began and Arthur gave her his usual heart-stopping grin, the one she hadn't seen properly for so long.

"I was due home all along but I wanted it to be a surprise." Arthur laughed as he kissed her again.

"I can't believe this," Gwen stated, still in slight shock. She hadn't even considered the possibility that Arthur had gotten his leave and that the others had helped pull this off without letting anything slip.

Arthur just kissed her again and held his wife as close to him as he could. "Happy anniversary Guinevere."

**AN: This one was inspired by the videos on YouTube of soldiers surprising their loved ones by returning from Afghanistan earlier than expected. Hope you enjoyed it. **


	3. Thinking Of You

**AN: Thanks for your reviews and support. Set after 4x02. **

_**Because when I'm with him **_

_**I am thinking of you**_

_**Thinking of you, **_

_**What you would do**_

_**If you were the one **_

_**Who was spending the night?**_

_**Oh I wish that I **_

_**Was looking into your eyes.**_

'_**Thinking Of You'-**_** Katy Perry**

"Sometimes I really hate you."

The words were spoken in a whisper, almost inaudible. Even though the room was empty, Arthur hardly dared raise his voice above a whisper. It didn't matter anyway, nobody could see or hear him and even if they did; they knew better than to question him. Arthur looked around the room before continuing with his monologue.

"I hate how you were able to cause so much trouble without even realising what you'd done. I hate how I could never stay mad at you for long. I hate how you helped us and I hate myself for hating the fact you did come to our aid whenever we needed you to. I hate how you always had to be the one who made me feel like this. You don't deserve this hate but yet, I can't stop myself. I just hate you so much right now." Arthur confessed as he looked out the window at the two figures that were sat on the steps, their arms around each other's shoulders.

They had been doing that a lot lately since It happened. They seemed to have changed, they weren't themselves, they just sort-of drifted around like in a dream state. What had happened had been a shock to them all but it had affected those two the most. It didn't take much for the tears to start; today they had been tidying His Room and they both began sobbing; not just for the loss of their friend but also for the Survivor's Guilt they were now suffering from. Merlin blamed himself for not being quick enough to save him. Gwen blamed herself for asking him to make a vow to do whatever it takes, knowing full well he would refuse to ever deny her anything. As he watched his best friend and his beloved mourn, Arthur's temper and hatred seemed to spike again as he questioned the silence in the room.

"Why did you have to do all of this? Why were you able to mess with our lives so easily? Why were you able to play with our emotions this way? Why did you always make me feel that- that I was never good enough? In comparison to you, why was I not good enough for her?" Arthur asked.

At first he hadn't noticed, but that was because it was back before he noticed her. The second time however, it was clear to all of them. They were the three points of a triangle. Guinevere at the top and the two of them at the bottom. Both attempting to reach her but unsure where her affections had really lain. The third time, things had greatly changed; he and Guinevere had been involved in their secret relationship and he was certain of their love. But then he had seen the light in her eyes and heard how she said his name; in breathless shock after the rockslide cleared and he came into view along with Percival.

"Lancelot?"

It had been like a punch to the stomach. The last thing Arthur had wanted or needed was for Lancelot to return. In fairness the fact he and Percival were willing to fight and lay down their lives for him and his kingdom were admirable and he had knighted them for it. In the battle, Lancelot had remained by Merlin's side as they went to destroy the Cup of Life. But before that; in that old castle where they had found the round table and prepared for battle; Arthur had seen the way Lancelot looked at Guinevere. A blind man could have seen that the dark-haired knight still loved her. Maybe that was why Arthur held her all the more tighter; why he had made sure to barely leave her side and why he had kissed her in front of him both before and after the battle. It was a low blow but also a silent reminder towards his rival:_ Guinevere chose me and not you. So back off. _It was also childish in a way. Similar to a five year old thumbing his nose, chanting _'nah-nah-nah-nah-nah'_ and blowing a raspberry.

Arthur clenched his fist as he looked around the room. "I hate how you were able to mess with my head whenever it came to Guinevere. I hate how you played with her emotions whenever she was held hostage by Hengist. I hate how you could give her everything she ever wanted and more while I could give her nothing. I hate how you caused her conflict through what you've done. I hate how you would stare at her like a wounded puppy. I hate…" Arthur trailed off, unsure of how to finish that particular part of his rant and instead let his thoughts and memories wash over them.

_Arthur slowly woke up rubbing his shoulder. Sleeping on the forest floor whilst still in chainmail is never a good idea yet he never learnt. Guinevere was still asleep, curled up in a ball, swamped in Morgana's scarlet cloak. Arthur took a moment to image always waking up to that sight, Guinevere, his wife in their bed. He would do anything to make that possible. As Arthur got to his feet, he could tell something was wrong. Merlin was staring into space and didn't react whenever Arthur said his name._

_Lancelot had gone. _

_When Guinevere woke up, the first thing she did was ask about Lancelot and it had been a straight kick in the teeth for Arthur. Of course she would have asked about Lancelot. But his own self-pity turned to anger when he noticed the tears in her eyes and the way she spent the remainder of the return to Camelot in total silence. Who did Lancelot think he was, messing with Guinevere's head and heart like that? Arthur wasn't exactly sure what was going on between himself and Guinevere but he did know that he would never, __ever__ do anything like that to Guinevere._

_Arthur watched as Gwen, Merlin and Lancelot joked around one afternoon. As he watched how Gwen tilted her head back as Lancelot made some wisecrack, Arthur realised just how easy Lancelot would have had it if Guinevere had chosen him. Nobody would have opposed their relationship or told Lancelot that Guinevere 'wasn't good enough' for him the way Arthur had been told. They wouldn't have to hide from the world like Arthur and Guinevere had to. As Arthur watched, Merlin began doing a crude impersonation of him causing them both to laugh all the harder._

"_Come on Merlin, he's not that bad." Gwen defended and Arthur smiled, of course she would defend him._

"_Maybe not to you but that's because he loves you. Me however, it's all 'Do this Merlin!' 'Clean my boots Merlin!' 'I'm the biggest prat in Camelot so you'll do as I say Merlin!" Merlin retorted, returning to his Arthur Voice. Arthur noticed Lancelot's reaction whenever Merlin said that. He managed to force a laugh but Arthur could see the look in his eyes whenever Merlin commented about Arthur's feelings. It was a look of longing for a dream that was just out of reach. Arthur realised then that Lancelot was thinking the same thing. He knew how easy things would be if he was in Arthur's position but he also knew it would never happen. One thing the men had in common was that neither of them ever wanted to cause Guinevere pain or force her to choose between them. Guinevere had made her choice a long time ago. She'd chosen Arthur._

"The worst thing I hate about you is that no matter how much I try to hate you, I can't help but remember how good a person you are. Your loyalty to all of us, your bravery, your ability to put everyone else and their needs before your own are undeniable. Every feeling or attempt of hatred I have cannot be contained for long. Sometimes I think it would have been better if I had let Guinevere go, let the two of you be together instead. But I didn't because I'm selfish. I wanted her love for myself even though I can promise her nothing and you wouldn't have just promised her everything; you would have given her everything. Why the hell did she choose me over you?" Arthur asked the empty room aloud.

"Because I love you."

Arthur spun on the spot and stared at Gwen who was standing in the doorway. Her face was still tear stained as she entered the room and wrapped her arms around Arthur's waist and pressed her head onto his shoulder. Arthur wrapped his arms tightly around Gwen and hugged her closer to him.

"How much did you hear?" Arthur asked.

"Enough. It was never Lancelot; it was you. It was always you." Gwen reassured.

"Why? If you were together, you wouldn't have had to hide the way we do; he wouldn't hurt you the way I do. He could give you everything you've ever wanted and more. Besides, he's practically perfect and I'm not. Why did you choose me?" Arthur asked.

"Like I said, I love you. Yes you're flawed and running around and being secretive isn't easy but I just need to remember your courage, your heart and the fact you've never intentionally hurt me. Any bumps in the road we countered weren't your fault. Enchantments, beasts, arranged marriages and danger seem to be part-and-parcel with your day to day life. Besides he left me twice before claiming he loved me all along. You don't do that to people you love. Even if he could have given me material possessions, he could never give me the one thing I want and need more than anything else in the world." Gwen explained.

"What's that?" Arthur asked.

"This," Gwen replied as she stood on her toes and kissed Arthur. It took a few seconds for Arthur to respond to the kiss but he tightened his hold on Gwen as they opened their mouths to let their tongues meet. As they stood entwined, it seemed like all of Arthur's doubts and fears and anger and hatred and envy was being washed away. All that mattered was here and now. He was standing in Camelot, he was kissing Guinevere and he knew he loved her just as much as she loved him. Arthur knew that his fears and concerns had been blown out of proportion by his mind but the kiss reassured him that everything would be alright. After a few minutes they broke apart and Gwen smiled at Arthur.

"How could Lancelot have given me a kiss from the man I love, if the man I love is you? Besides," the smile fell from Gwen's face as she looked around the bare room which was going to be assigned to a new knight tomorrow. This had been what had upset her and Merlin earlier. They had volunteered to organise Lancelot's belongings and prepare the room for its newest resident but somehow despite everything; despite Merlin watching Lancelot walk into the Veil and Gwen watching the pyre burn; this served as the ultimate form of proof that what had happened hadn't just been some horrible nightmare that they would wake up from and everything would be OK. Sir Lancelot DuLac was dead. Gwen sighed sadly as she squeezed Arthur's hand and he hugged her close again as she finished her sentence.

"He's not coming back this time."


	4. I Won't Say I'm In Love

_**No chance, no way**_

_**I won't say I'm in love**_

_**You swoon, you sigh**_

_**Why deny it?**_

_**It's too clichéd**_

_**I won't say I'm in love.**_

'_**I Won't Say I'm In Love-**_** Hercules OST**

Gwen was not in love. She'd fallen into that trap before and was not going to do it again. It wasn't worth the emotional pain and heartbreak that love caused. She was not in love. She was not falling in love. And she certainly wasn't planning on falling in love anytime soon.

_Liar. You love him!_

_**Oh shut up you. I'm not in love. He's arrogant, a bully, rude-**_

_Handsome, charming, funny and a good kisser! Admit it, you're in love!_

_**No I'm not!**_

_Gwen and Arthur sitting in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G! _

_**I'm not listening to you!**_

Gwen wasn't hearing voices in her head; she was having an inner argument with her heart. Who it seemed was actually quite the loud-mouth. Gwen lay on her bed and rubbed her forehead. For the past few weeks Gwen had been slowly driving herself mad. She did not have feelings for Arthur. She did not see him as anything other than a prince and a sort-of friend. And she most defiantly was not suffering from some form of denial.

_Yes you are!_

"Oh shut up!" Gwen muttered under her breath.

And so the insanity began again. Somehow Arthur just kept wandering into her head and controlling her thoughts. It was surreal. Nobody had ever been able to do this sort of thing to her before. Whenever he caught her eye, she could feel herself blushing. There was something about the way he smiled at her; it was different from how he smiled at other people. Not to mention the way he said her name. _Guinevere._ Never Gwen but always Guinevere. Gwen had always hated her full name. Ever since she could remember, she had insisted on being called Gwen and the only time someone called her Guinevere was when she got into trouble. There was something about how Arthur said it; he made her name sound more important, more regal. Like it was the name destined for a princess and not a servant. The problem was that Gwen had always been a rational and level-headed person who tended to deal with realism and not fantasy. Whatever existed between her and Arthur could never become a proper relationship.

He was the prince. Someday he was going to marry some lady or princess and Gwen will go back to being nothing more than a servant. After having her heart being used as a plaything by a certain dark-haired someone who shall remain nameless; well, it was understandable why Gwen wanted to be cautious.

_Forget caution, take a risk! What have we got to lose?_

_**Oh I don't know, my dignity, my ability to trust people as well as making a complete and utter idiot of myself. Not to mention how Uther would react. Call me crazy but I like both living in Camelot and living in general. **_

_Chicken!_

_**Am not!**_

_Are too!_

_**Am not!**_

_Prove it. I dare you. _

Gwen sat up in her bed and shook her head. This was stupid. This wasn't going to be like some child's story where the handsome prince and the pretty maiden ride off into the sunset and live happily ever after. This was the real world. And in the real world a servant and a prince could not be anything other than that. Servant and prince. __Besides it wasn't like Arthur felt the same way. She was just Morgana's servant. The shy, meek little mouse with the bad temper and a short fuse. There was nothing amazing or extraordinary about her, certainly not anything that would appeal to a prince. Maybe that was what she was to him? She was the forbidden fruit. Uther said Arthur couldn't be with someone who wasn't a noblewoman so this was Arthur's way of rebelling against the rules.

Harsh? Yes. True?

_**Maybe…**_

_NO!_

That's the thing, how could she be sure? Gwen was hardly going to ask him how he felt straight out. There were just some things that weren't done. But what was she supposed to do?

"Why does this have to be so complicated?" Gwen asked as she flung herself back onto her lumpy bedding and sighed deeply. Maybe she should just sleep on it; get a fresh look at the situation in the morning.

With that thought in mind, Gwen fell slowly into an uneasy sleep.

_Gwen pushed open the door, a pile of linens in her arms. As the door opened she walked into to see Arthur kneeling in front of a beautiful woman, dressed in an expensive and elaborate dress and bedecked with the fined jewels. _

"_Oh Arthur of course I'll marry you." The woman said as Arthur slid the ring onto her finger and they kissed and Gwen's heart shattered into a million pieces. _

_Then the dream changed. Instead it was Gwen sitting in front of Arthur who adorably stammered his way nervously through the proposal and there was only one answer she could give him._

"_Yes,"_

Gwen woke up simply feeling more confused. If she didn't love Arthur then why was she dreaming stuff like that? Why would it affect her so much if Arthur did marry another woman if she didn't hold any feelings for him? What the hell was going on? Was she going insane or something? Gwen remained in a daze for most of the morning and at around midday, Morgana had had enough.

"Alright Gwen, who is he?" Morgana asked.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Gwen denied.

"You've been in a complete daze the past while so come on. Who is he?" Morgana pressed, smiling at the woman she considered to be like a sister to her.

"Nobody," Gwen denied.

"Is it Merlin?" Morgana asked and Gwen burst out laughing. "Ok maybe not. Hmm, it must be someone I know otherwise you would have told me."

"She would have told you what?" Arthur asked as he barged into Morgana's room without knocking and flung himself onto the bed.

"Don't you ever knock?" Morgana asked. "Anyway it's none of your business."

Arthur pulled a face at Morgana before he turned to Gwen who returned to her work to avoid making eye contact with the prince, concerned that if they did make eye contact, she would somehow betray herself. Now that he thought about it, Guinevere had been acting strange lately. She had been quieter than usual and didn't even react whenever he tossed a goblet at Merlin in front of her yesterday. He hoped nothing was wrong with her.

"So you do have any reason to be here?" Morgana asked after a few moments.

"No, I just felt you should be honoured by my presence." Arthur joked with a grin. Morgana raised an eyebrow and Gwen smiled briefly before returning to her work.

"We'd be more honoured if you left. Right Gwen?" Morgana asked. Both Morgana and Arthur looked at the servant as they waited on her answer.

"It's really up to the both of you. Excuse me," Gwen replied as she gathered up the laundry and left the room before she put her foot into her mouth. Morgana watched her friend go before turning back to Arthur who was looking as confused as she felt. Usually Gwen sided with Morgana, giving a polite excuse for Arthur to leave or else stayed silent.

"I need to be going anyway. I told Merlin to shine my armour; God knows what sort of state it's in now." Arthur said as he got up and left the room. As the door shut behind him, Morgana thought about what had happened and it hit her.

"Oh my god," Morgana muttered to herself. Gwen liked Arthur. Arthur! The same annoying pig-headed person who went out of his way to drive them mad. It looked as though he succeeded in Gwen's case. If Morgana's memory served correctly, Gwen had never shown interest in Arthur before like this. She didn't know whether to be confused, supportive or to chase down Arthur and threaten him with various forms of torture if he ever did anything to upset Gwen. Morgana felt like the sister Gwen had never had and she just wanted to protect her. Morgana grinned to herself as she considered the possible punishments she could inflict on Arthur if he did so anything to hurt Gwen.

"Guinevere, wait a minute."

Gwen turned and watched as Arthur jogged towards her before quickly curtsying. "My lord,"

"How many times have I asked you to call me Arthur?" Arthur asked with a smile.

"Sorry, Arthur. Is there a problem?" Gwen asked.

"That's what I was going to ask you. You haven't been yourself lately. Is something troubling you?" Arthur asked as he took her hand.

_**Yes, you!**_

"Nothing, I'm fine. It's probably just a case of overwork. Not-not that Lady Morgana overworks me; just you know it' just one of those things. Except you wouldn't know-"

"Guinevere, calm down." Arthur reassured and Gwen bit her lip. She hated that she babbled whenever she got put on the spot or nervous and these were two things Arthur unknowingly excelled at doing to her. Arthur smiled reassuringly at her and Gwen wasn't sure whether the tingling sensation in her stomach or the feeling of Arthur's fingers wrapped around hers was supposed to make her feel better or worse.

"Just so you know, if there is something troubling you then you can tell me. I care about you and I want to help you if I can. I have to go but I'll hopefully see you soon." Arthur said and he quickly kissed her cheek before walking away. Gwen watched him go and leant against the wall to gather her thoughts.

_**Ok maybe he is handsome and funny and can be very sweet if he wants to be. But it doesn't mean I'm falling in love with him. We're just friends. That's all. I'm not in love with him!**_

_Yeah, you just keep telling yourself that and maybe you'll believe it. _


	5. Snow White Queen

**AN: This chapter contains my first attempt at a darker style of writing. I have never written anything like this before and I sought kbrand5333's advice who just told me to go for it. **

_**You belong to me**_

_**My Snow White Queen**_

_**There's nowhere to run my love**_

_**So let's just get it over**_

_**Soon enough you'll see**_

_**You're just like me**_

_**Don't scream anymore my love**_

_**Because all I want is you.**_

'_**Snow White Queen'-Evanescence.**_

Guinevere was not afraid of anything. Sure she got scared sometimes, everyone does but there was nothing she was afraid of. Some people get scared by rats or spiders or the dark but Gwen had never been like that. She had always been a rational person; rodents were dealt with by shooing them with a broom. Spiders were easily hit with a shoe or whatever object came to hand. As for the dark; in her youth Gwen had been the one _making_ the various screams and wolf-howls which sent children running and crying to their parents. She wouldn't define herself as brave, she just didn't get scared the way other people did.

But she was scared now.

She was scared of going home in case He had been there. Gwen could always tell when He had been there. He left his little signals. A strand of fine ribbon which she would have admired on the market stall tied around the door handle with a bundle of her favourite flowers attached along with a sealed letter. To bystanders it seemed sweet, light-hearted and innocent because in the beginning; that was what He had been. Gwen had simply come home from work one day to find the little gift attached to the door. She had opened the letter to reveal a beautiful piece of calligraphic writing. The sender expresses his compliments of her beauty, kindness and admitted, almost blushingly, of his developing attraction to her. There was no signature. Gwen had hidden the letter from her father, placed the ribbon with the box of fabric she had stored to make any new clothes and decorated her hair with the flowers.

However as time passed, the letters changed. The second one came after her father's death and the sender expressed his consolations and reassured her that she would never be alone; a sweet letter which was hidden with the first. The third was when things started to change. The language turned from romantic to possessive. The sender talked about her future with him. How they would be together forever and ended with the words: _I am always with you and soon you shall be with me. Always. _Gwen had tried to dismiss the letters and focus on her life. Yet it seemed the sender had stuck to his word.

Whenever she allowed Arthur to stay with her; his next letter warned her about _'letting strange men stay with my beloved.'_

After her kidnapping at the hands of Hengist he warned that _'if anything happened to my wife again, I will make any man pay with his life. You are mine to protect, mine to own. I love you, you love me. Do not forget you don't need anyone else but me.' _

Gwen tried to ignore the letters but his 'affections' had not gone unnoticed. Women asked her who her secret admirer was and Gwen couldn't admit the truth about the letters. Instead she would shrug it off, admitting the letters were anonymous. He must have been watching her. His letters began ended with phrases such as '_soon my beloved, you shall be mine'_ and '_don't worry my love, soon we shall be free.'_ The possibility of her being watched by him was reinforced by various comments in his letters. He complimented her on her day's dress or her hair, he mentioned how she walked and who she spoke with. He had a clear disapproval of her talking to anyone; claiming that he was all she needed, all she would need. Gwen attempted to ignore the letters but was drawn to finding out what he had to say. She tried burning the letters but the next would always warn her that burning the words would do nothing.

Then Gwen managed to stop herself reading them. any of his 'gifts' were thrown straight into the fire. She didn't even bother to remove the flowers or the ribbon, all of it was just burnt. Gwen slowly managed to focus on what was happening around her which was good. Morgana's disappearance and the dragon attack required all her attention. As too did her developing relationship with Arthur. As Gwen had stopped reading his letters; she wasn't sure whether or not the sender knew about her relationship with Arthur. In time the nightmare faded. She stopped being so scared. It just became a habit to burn the letters, the same way Merlin had a habit of waking Arthur each morning with a loud cry of 'rise and shine'. It just became part of her life. Soon the fear and uncertainty caused by the letters began to fade. Gwen began to breathe again.

Gwen believed the nightmare was over.

But it was only just beginning.

He was like a man obsessed. Every thought revolved around _her._ What she was doing, what she was wearing, who she was with and how long it would take until she was his. There was something about her which drew her to him. It wasn't just her beauty or kindness; it was her as a whole. She was unique to anyone he'd ever met. She was a strange paradox. She could be quite smart yet he knew she was easily confused. She was stubborn but meek. She could be brave but he had seen her get scared. There was also something innately pure about her. Life's harshness affected her just as much and possibly more than some, yet it didn't taint or break her the way it did others. She just kept her head up and went on with her life. He knew what she was like. She was like the first snow day of the winter. When the snow is pure and whole before it's trodden on and ruined. That's what she was. She was the fresh white snow of the winter morning; unaffected by the world. That was what she was and what she could be. She was his queen. His Snow White Queen.

He knew she loved him. It was only a matter of time. They were destined to be together and nothing and nobody else was going to change that. He knew she had been getting his letters and that she had been burning them. Those letters took hours to write; not only was he expressing his feelings but taking the effort to write them in a way that would allow him to keep his identity secret. One thing about his beloved which stopped her from being completely perfect to him was her headstrongness. When she became his, she would no longer be this way. He will own her and she will belong to him and she will not fight anymore. She will love him too much to fight. He watched her. He always watched her. When she was working. When she was with her friends. When she was in the market. When she was home alone. He was there. He was watching. He was waiting. It wouldn't be long now.

Gwen slowly made her way home feeling completely exhausted. A bad bout of flu had swept through the villages and made its way to the lower town. It had kept her, Gaius and Merlin run ragged all day and all Gwen wanted to do now was collapse into her bed and sleep. As Gwen reached her door, her fingers ran across something smooth. A ribbon. Gwen was suddenly wide awake as she loosened the ribbon from around the door handle and looked at the package. She had gotten so used to simply grabbing and burning that she had never taken the time to actually look at the object anymore. It was a thread of ribbon, purple with blue embroidery at the edges and wrapped around a bunch of lavender and lilac and a rolled-up letter. Gwen held onto it nervously as though it were about to bite her or unleash a deadly poison.

"Oh get a hold of yourself. You ran into a courtyard that was being attacked by a dragon. You can handle one letter." Gwen scolded herself. There was nothing dangerous about the letter. It was just someone's idea of a cruel practical joke which had gone too far. Gwen detached the letter and unfurled it as she quickly read it, she clenched it in her hand and ran to the one place she knew she would be safe.

"Guinevere, what's wrong?" Arthur asked as Gwen burst into the room looking terrified and pressed her face into his shoulder the way a frightened child would seek comfort from her father. Gwen pressed the crumpled parchment into his hand and read the letter.

_Oh my beloved,_

_You have been quite stubborn haven't you? You have been burning my letters. You would me my love. I know that you love me just as much as I love you. Don't fear me, my love. Soon you will understand that we are destined to be together. Soon you will become my wife. I already have it planned out. Our wedding day itself is unimportant. It's just a public way of proving our love for each other and that you are mine and mine alone. I'll make sure every man knows you are mine; there will be nobody foolish enough to try and steal you from me for if he even attempted to, I will kill him. slowly and cruelly I will kill him. No man will mean as much to you as I do. I shall be all that matters to you. I will be the only one you care about. The only one you love. I long too for our wedding night. That shall be the night you will truly be mine, now and forever. I imagine what I'll do to make you mine. Every part of you from your head to your toes and even your burn scar shall belong to me. Do not try and fight your feelings anymore my dearest. You cannot fight Fate. Soon you will submit and you will understand. All will become clear, until then my love. Until then, we wait. While our future may not involve a kingdom, in my eyes you are my queen. _

_Remember I am with you and watching you always._

_Your future beloved husband. _

Arthur looked from the letter to Gwen who had managed to get a hold over herself and calm down. Arthur stepped back from Gwen and wiped the tears from her face. Gwen looked at the expression of concern which covered Arthur's face and she felt stupid for not telling him sooner. But what could Arthur have done? She didn't know who the sender was so how could he know?

"Have there been any more of these?" Arthur asked.

"Yes," Gwen replied.

"How long has it been going on for?" Arthur asked.

"Months, he also sends me ribbon and flowers as tokens of his so-called love. I usually just burn them all but I couldn't stop myself from reading that one and I had to come straight up here. Arthur, I'm scared." Gwen confessed.

"It'll be alright." Arthur reassured as he tried to hug Gwen but she pushed him away.

"No Arthur you don't understand. My burn scar, the one he mentions in the letter, was one I got when I was three and I accidentally leant against the anvil in my father's forge. The scar is just above my backside so nobody has ever seen it and the only other person who knows about it is my brother. Arthur whoever this person is; he has been following me, watching me. He- he's seen me naked Arthur. And I don't know who he is. I don't know where he is. But he's always there. I just can't take it anymore." Gwen admitted as she broke down. She had been lying to herself. Even though she had destroyed the letters, he had still managed to control her. She still got scared whenever she seen he had been there but this was on a whole new level. The possessive and domineering language and imagery had been bad enough but this was worse. She wasn't even safe in her own home anymore.

Arthur wrapped his arms around Gwen and held her tight. "Listen to me; I will not let anything happen to you. I promise you I will find out who is doing this and I will make them pay. If you do get any more letters just burn them. Don't even look at them. Just burn them." Arthur advised as he kissed her forehead and walked her home. whenever she got home, Gwen locked and bolted the door before pushing the table in front of it. She covered all of the windows and even got changed in the small area where she kept her food with the screen separating her from the rest of the house. Whoever this person was, she wasn't going to let them win.

As time passed, once again it was like a nightmare fading. Life just got more and more hectic for Gwen. Morgana had returned, only they all realised too late that this Morgana was more different, more deadly. Gwen had helped Merlin fight a goblin, befriended Gwaine, maintained her secret relationship with Arthur; was reunited with Elyan; realised Morgana wasn't what she seemed; got busted by Uther before Morgana betrayed them all and she had to break Leon out of prison and help with the fight for Camelot, not to mention the almost daily battles to survive. With all of that going on, Gwen had managed to push the letters from her mind. However whenever Elyan returned, the letters lessened in frequency until they stopped after the battle for Camelot. It seemed the sender knew that with an older brother who was now a knight around to protect her, it would be more difficult for him to try and stake his claim on Gwen.

Indeed while Gwen could never forget the fear induced by the letters; it was like looking back on a childhood fear which had been overcome. There was no reason to be afraid anymore. She was older, wiser and stronger. Before Gwen knew it, the second battle against Morgana had been fought and won and Arthur had re-proposed to her. They had married and Gwen was now the Queen of Camelot.

At this moment in time, Gwen was sitting nervously on Arthur's bed. It was a good kind of nervous, an excited sort. This was her wedding night with the man she loved. It was ok to be a little bit afraid. She'd never done this before. Arthur locked the door and walked over to the bed. As he kissed Gwen, there was something more dominant in this kiss that was unlike any other kiss he'd ever given her. Indeed as he pulled back, Gwen saw there was something different in his eyes. Something that wasn't loving or even lustful. It was triumphant and possessive and the words he whispered to her chilled her to the bone.

"I told you that you would belong to me. Don't fight it my love. You are mine."

_Forever and ever and ever and ever…_

**AN: What did you think? This was my first time writing Dark!Arthur so any feedback would be appreciated. **


	6. Hero

_**I can be your hero baby**_

_**I can kiss away your pain**_

_**I would stand by you forever**_

_**You can take my breath away**_

_**I can be your hero**_

'_**Hero'-**_**Enrique Iglesias. **

"MERLIN! GWAINE! I SWEAR I WILL KILL YOU!"

The loud bellow echoed off the walls and was accompanied by the snorting laughter of the two men who were grinning triumphantly at the success of their prank. They had managed to rig it so that whenever Arthur stepped into the small noose, it would hoist him into the air upside down, suspended from the ceiling and swinging back and forth. There had been no real provocation for the prank; Arthur hadn't been acting more of a prat than usual. Merlin and Gwaine had simply just been bored. Arthur wriggled around helplessly in an attempt to loosen the ropes but it served no other purpose than to make him swing back and forth even more.

"Will one of you untie me?" Arthur asked.

"What's the word?" Gwaine prompted cheekily. Arthur rolled his eyes.

"Now!" Arthur snapped.

"Sorry we can't. we've got work to do. see you later." Merlin sniggered as he and Gwaine left the room and took off down the corridor still laughing about their prank.

Arthur could feel all the blood running to his head as he attempted to free himself. However each attempt was fruitless and Arthur was all but ready to resort to desperate measures and call for someone to help him when there came a knock at the door.

"Who is it?" Arthur called. If it were one of the knights or his uncle or one of the guards; it would be embarrassing but bearable as he knew he would be swiftly freed from this trap.

"It's Gwen, can I come in?" Gwen asked. Dammit, Arthur thought. He could not have Guinevere seeing him like this. Arthur did some quick thinking to come up with a good enough excuse.

"Um, well you see. I-I'm in the bath right now." Arthur lied.

"Oh, alright I can come back later if you like." Gwen offered and Arthur realised that if he turned her away then the longer he'd have to wait for someone to help him.

"Actually Guinevere, it's fine you can come in." Arthur said and he waited for the inevitable laughter. However to her credit, Gwen didn't go into hysterics, rather the expression on her face was akin to the Donkey Incident. It was more wide-eyed shock but he could see the flicker of amusement in her eyes.

Gwen hadn't known what to expect whenever Arthur allowed her to come in after turning her away. However it was fair to say she didn't expect to see Arthur hanging upside down by the ankles with a red-purple face and a glare that could meet iron. Gwen walked over to Arthur and raised her eyebrows in a 'do I really want to know' manner. Arthur's face burned but the blood rush managed to hide it on his cheeks as he shook his head.

"I don't suppose you could get me down, could you?" Arthur asked. Gwen nodded and set out his cushions and pillows onto the floor to soften his fall and positioned a chair for her to stand on to reach the rope. However before she began to cut it; Gwen jumped off the chair and looked at Arthur. Even upside down they were almost face to face with each other and the impulsive idea had come to her out of nowhere.

"What are you doing?" Arthur asked.

"I just want to do one thing before I cut you down." Gwen replied.

Gwen moved closer to Arthur and kissed him. The kiss was… different to say the least considering Arthur was dangling by the ankles; her top lip was brushing against his bottom and his nose was brushing against her chin. This kiss was more passionate, more of an impulsive nature as Gwen took control, using her tongue to gently open Arthur's mouth in order to deepen the kiss. Arthur was now certain that the dizziness he was now experiencing wasn't being caused by the blood rush. After a few minutes they broke apart and Gwen blushed as she fetched a small dagger which Arthur kept in one of his drawers and climbed back onto the chair to cut him loose. Arthur landed onto the cushions with a flump and slowly got to his feet rubbing his head.

"Are you alright?" Gwen asked as Arthur's blood flow returned to normal and some of the colour faded from his cheeks.

"Never better thanks to you." Arthur replied as he kissed her again.

Maybe he wouldn't kill Merlin and Gwaine after all. Maybe he'd just seriously injure them instead.

**AN: Just a short one this evening. I love the Spiderman kiss; it's possibly my favourite movie kiss ever and I wanted to do an Arthur/Gwen version for ages.**


	7. Puppy Love

_**And they called it puppy love  
Oh I guess they'll never know  
How a young heart really feels  
And just why I love her so**_

'_**Puppy Love'-**_**Donny Osmond**

It was break time and the Year One pupils were in their playground that was shared with the Reception class and Year Two while the Years Three to Six were in their larger shared playground that was separated by a small fence. The younger students playground was medium sized and able to incorporate a game of football; a hopscotch match, a game of chase; a pretend game or two and those who had smuggled in either toy cars, skipping ropes or dolls to play with instead.

Arthur and his friends were playing a game of football and he passed it to Mithian who kicked the soft plastic ball too hard and sent it flying into the older student's playground. Two Year Six boys picked up the ball and approached the small fence. Arthur and Mithian ran up to the fence and offered up their hands.

"Can we have our ball back please?" Arthur asked.

"No," the first boy replied.

"Why not?" Mithian asked.

"It's in our yard so it's ours now. Pass it Cenred!" the second boy said as they began to taunt the small children by passing the ball back and forth. The teachers on duty had been distracted by one of the Year Four boys who had accidentally sent the basketball out into the road and didn't notice the two Year Six's taunting the Year One and Two footballers who had gathered by the fence and were pleading for their ball back.

"This isn't fair! Give it back!" Mithian demanded; her little face red with frustration.

"Why don't you make us!" Cenred taunted.

"If you don't we'll tell on you!" Gwaine threatened; trying to appear as tough as any five year old could.

"Oh we're so scared aren't we Helios? Tell you what; we'll give you your ball back if you come in here and take it back." Cenred offered. They all knew that the younger pupils weren't permitted into the older student's playground and none of them would be willing to break the rules, not even for a football.

"Alright."

They all turned at the voice which had spoken up. A small girl with dark curly hair in two bunches and a skipping rope held in her hand approached the fence. Arthur frowned at her in confusion. That was the new girl, Gwen, who had just started their school on Monday. She was a shy girl and didn't have many friends yet; preferring to keep to herself in the classroom and during playtime. Her older brother was in Year Three and was still taking part in the older student's football match. Mithian walked over to her.

"Gwen we're not allowed in there." Mithian warned. "You'll get into trouble."

"They're being mean and it's our ball, not theirs." Gwen replied as she handed Mithian her skipping rope and climbed over the fence into the older student's playground and turned to Cenred and Helios. "Please give us our ball back."

"Why should we?" Cenred asked as he held the ball tauntingly above her head.

"Because you're just being mean and you said if we came here to get it back; you'd give it back. You can't break a promise, that's bad." Gwen replied. Both boys were twice her height but the injustice of the situation meant she was refusing to back down. Gwen folded her arms and glared at the two boys. Arthur looked at the girl with newfound admiration. She was really brave!

Cenred and Helios however thought otherwise and instead began playing a game of Piggy in the Middle. After a few minutes, Gwen's face hardened and as Helios caught the ball she gave him a sudden hard shove. Caught off guard; Helios fell to the ground and Gwen wrenched the ball out of his hands.

"Arthur catch!" Gwen shouted as she threw the ball over the fence. Arthur caught it and grinned at her as he raised the ball into the air like it was a trophy. As Gwen went to climb the fence again, Cenred gave her a shove and sent her crashing to the ground. The fall skinned one knee and cutting the other and causing her to start crying. Arthur frowned as instead of helping her up or saying sorry; the boys began teasing Gwen instead, calling her a baby. That wasn't just being mean, that was bullying! Arthur dropped the ball and climbed over the fence too. As he helped Gwen up as the teacher on duty finally rushed over to them.

"What is going on here?" she asked looking at the four students.

"They climbed the fence Miss and she fell." Cenred replied.

"They wouldn't give us our ball back and he pushed Gwen over!" Arthur argued.

"She attacked me first. We didn't do nothing wrong." Helios lied. This statement was met with loud calls of 'liar' and 'they started it' from the younger students who began voicing their anger at the mistreatment of one of their own. The teacher silenced them and crouched down to face Arthur and Gwen and study Gwen's sore knees.

"You'll have to go to the nurse. Cenred and Helios go to the principal's office. How dare you treat a little girl this way? I don't want to hear any arguments! Go!" the teacher ordered. Cenred and Helios slunk off into the school glaring at Gwen and Arthur who tightened his hold around Gwen's shoulders. "As for you two; I suggest you don't make a habit of this. You're not allowed to climb over the fence is that understood?"

"Yes Miss," they chorused.

"Very well then, you're Elyan's sister aren't you?" the teacher asked Gwen who nodded. "So I take it you don't know where the nurse's room is. Arthur why don't you take her quickly before the bell goes."

"Yes Miss." Arthur said as he helped Gwen limp into the school. Gwen used her free hand to wipe her face as the two five year olds made their way down the corridor.

"That was really brave of you." Arthur complimented.

"Thanks, they were just being so mean. I hate when people are mean like that." Gwen replied.

"Me too but I wouldn't have been brave enough to go over the fence." Arthur said.

"But you did go over the fence." Gwen reminded.

"Yeah because they hurt you. That was bad and I," Arthur trailed off embarrassed at what he was about to admit.

"What?" Gwen asked.

"I was scared they'd hurt you and when they did I was so mad that I didn't think about getting caught. I just climbed the fence anyway." Arthur confessed as he knocked on the school nurse's door.

"What happened here?" Alice asked as she opened the door to let the two Year One's into the room. There was a bed, a sink, a desk with a few chairs and a large cabinet along with various posters on the wall. Arthur helped Gwen onto the chair as she ducked her head; suddenly shy despite the kind-faced nurse.

"She got pushed over by some of the big boys." Arthur replied. Alice shook her head and fetched some salve, plasters and cotton wads.

"Alright pet, this is going to sting a little bit but you'll be fine in a few minutes." Alice said as she gently dabbed the wound before applying the salve and sticking plasters over the cuts. Gwen winced slightly at the stinging of the salve but smiled at the flower-plasters which had been stuck over the wound. As they left the nurse's room the bell rang and they walked back to their classroom where they could hear the sounds of the other pupils settling back into their seats.

"Thanks for getting our ball back." Arthur smiled at Gwen. Said ball was back in its usual space during class time; tucked safely underneath the benches by the coat hooks.

"It was nothing. Thanks for helping me." Gwen smiled and she leant over and suddenly kissed Arthur's cheek before giggling and walking into the classroom.

"Ew! Girl germs!" Arthur whined as he furiously rubbed his cheek.


	8. Need You Now

_**It's a quarter after one**_

_**I'm all alone **_

_**And I need you now.**_

_**Said I wouldn't call**_

_**But I lost all control**_

_**And I need you now.**_

_**And I don't know how I can do without**_

_**I just need you now**_

'_**Need You Now'-**_** Lady Antebellum**

Whenever Tom died it had felt like her entire world had ended. Nothing else seemed to matter anymore because Tom had gone.. Tom had been the only family Gwen had had at the time. Her mother died when she was sixteen and Elyan had been who-knows-where. Yet even in those dark days when she had felt like she was alone, she hadn't been. Almost everyone who knew her rallied around. They spoke of the injustice of an innocent man dying a criminal's death and offered their help and support. They told her about various memories they had of Tom, how he was always willing to lend a hand to someone when they needed it and how much he was devoted to his family. It wasn't just the townspeople, Merlin and Gaius spent the first few awful nights with her and Leon was even able to sneak Morgana down after she was supposed to be asleep one night. That was how Gwen was able to make it through those dark days, with the love and support from everyone who cared about her and her father. It reminded her that she wasn't alone; there were still people who loved her.

That was why she was walking towards Arthur's chambers after the sun had set. Merlin had sat outside the chamber where Uther's body was laid all night for Arthur the night before however Gwen knew that Arthur was going to need someone with him tonight too. Not King Arthur but Arthur. As she neared his chambers, Merlin walked out hanging his head. For some reason, Uther's death seemed to affect Merlin more than Gwen expected. She wouldn't say that Merlin hated Uther but she supposed that the change in Uther ever since Morgana's treachery meant it wasn't a tyrannical Uther which had been killed; it had been a broken and depressed man. A more humane man had died. Gwen stopped Merlin and simply hugged him and Merlin latched onto the hug, grateful for someone to care about him.

Merlin still blamed himself for what had happened. Had he not checked Uther first instead of casting that spell… Arthur wasn't the only one who lost something important. His hopes and dreams for a free Camelot for everyone, especially those with magic; his destiny had been destroyed at his own hand. Even when Gaius showed him Morgana's charm that had been placed around Uther's neck by Agravaine; proving that it wasn't his fault, Merlin still carried the guilt with him. Merlin stepped back from Gwen and gave his friend a wan smile.

"Thanks," Merlin said honestly.

"Anytime Merlin. This wasn't anyone's fault except for that awful man who stabbed him." Gwen reassured.

"I know," Merlin sighed. "I'll see you later."

"Alright, get some sleep Merlin. You look exhausted." Gwen said and as Merlin walked down the corridor, Gwen approached Arthur's door and gently knocked on it before she let herself into the room. Arthur was lying on his bed and as Gwen moved into his line of sight, Arthur hurriedly wiped his face and sat up.

"Guinevere, I-" Arthur began but Gwen simply sat on the bed and wrapped her arms around Arthur.

Arthur had never been good at dealing with emotion. When Uther died and the sorcerer got away, Arthur had kicked walls, punched doors and wanted to break whatever he could get his hands on. Then last night he simply knelt by his father's body and felt a sense of numbness. He wasn't sure how he was supposed to feel. He was obviously devastated but considering the catatonic, depressed state Uther had spent most of the last year in; he barely talked or spoke or did anything; Arthur wondered if he'd be forgiven for thinking that maybe it was better he had died. Uther wasn't in any sort of pain anymore; he was free from Morgana and her sinister plots; he was finally at peace. Yet Arthur wondered whether Uther would ever really be at peace; he could strangely and vividly picture Uther's ghost stalking the castle on the lookout for more suspected sorcerers. Yet it was only now in the privacy of his chambers and with Guinevere's arms around him, did Arthur break down and let the tears he had bottled up out.

As Arthur sobbed, Gwen sat silently and let him cry. She rubbed his shoulder and let the shoulder of her dress be soaked by his tears. Neither of them were sure how long they sat like that; Arthur sobbing and Gwen consoling but Arthur eventually reached the sniffing-trying-to-stop stage and Gwen offered him a small handkerchief which he used to wipe his eyes and nose before rubbing his eyes with the palm of his hand. Arthur looked at his knees and shook his head.

"I can't do this." Arthur admitted.

"Yes you can," Gwen replied.

"I'm not ready to be king." Arthur denied.

"You know you are; you've been ruling this kingdom for over a year now Arthur. All that's changed is your title. You're still the same man." Gwen reassured. "Besides, you're not alone, me, Gaius, the knights, Lord Agravaine, Merlin, we're all with you and we're going to be with you every step of the way."

"I was feeling better until you mentioned Merlin." Arthur claimed but it was lacking his usual emotion. "I shouldn't have said that. He's actually been a good friend to me. I just, I know I'm going to mess it all up. No, I'm sure of it. Morgana's still out there; Odin's going to be baying for my blood all the more now because I'm king. I can't promise to be a good king to my people."

"I'm not saying it'll be easy but this is what you were born to do. You were born to be king and I know you'll be a great king. I'll admit that we all thought and expected it'd be many years before you became king but it's happened now and you're going to have all of us helping you, no matter what." Gwen promised.

Arthur nodded, he knew that. He knew that all of them, even Merlin, were an extended family for him. He knew that he wasn't the only one to lose a parent. In fact he was sure all of them had lost family members and that Gwen, Elyan and Percival were orphans too. It was just the fact that there were bigger implications for him. All his decisions now affected every last person in Camelot. He wanted to be a good king for his people. He wanted to make them all proud of him. He wanted Uther to be proud of him. There was no much resting on his shoulders now. So much he had and would have to do.

"I just want him to be proud of me." Arthur confessed in a whisper and Gwen tightened her hold on him.

"He was always proud." Gwen reassured as she thought back to one day a few months back.

_Gwen had fallen into the habit of talking to Uther as she worked. Her job now was a cross between being a maid and a carer to the king. As long as his chambers were tidy and he was content; there wasn't really that much she had to do. It was a fairly quiet afternoon and Uther was in his chair staring vacantly into the courtyard and barely acknowledging the information about business in the kingdom which Gwen was providing for him. He rarely did anyway. It was like there was a candle in his mind which had been blown out and all attempts to relight it had failed. _

"_There were some bandits in the woods who were harassing farmers and travellers as they made their way to the kingdom. Arthur was able to deal with them along with a few of the other knights quite easily." Gwen commented._

"_He's a good fighter." Uther suddenly commented and it took Gwen a moment to realise the raspy whisper had come from the king. She walked over to Uther and sat on the chair beside him._

"_Indeed he is, nobody has ever been able to truly best him in a fight." Gwen replied. "You must be very proud of him."_

"_Of course I'm proud. He's my boy. My only boy. I watched him grow. He's brave and strong and a good warrior and he's so much like his mother too." Uther whispered. Gwen paused; none of them had ever heard Uther talk about Queen Ygraine before. Of course she knew how loved the queen had been and the people still talked about the kind-hearted and beautiful queen who had been adored by her people who in turn had been just as broken-hearted by her tragic and premature death. _

"_I guess he is. I never knew the Queen myself." Gwen said. _

"_She was so kind, so beautiful, so loving towards her people. The only woman I ever loved. Arthur is the same. I love them both so. More than anything else in this world; the two of them. The two of them." Uther replied. Gwen nodded and gently reached out and took the king's hand. She had always seen Uther as a cold hearted tyrant. It was rare to see any sort of true affection from Uther, even now. Gwen wasn't sure why she had reached out; maybe it was because she sympathised with the obvious love and sorrow Uther still carried for Ygraine after all these years or maybe it was because this was one thing they both agreed on. Either way she held onto the king's hand and just for a few moments, Uther held it back. _

"He told you all of this?" Arthur asked.

"Yes, I don't think he was aware of who I was but Arthur, he's always loved you. I think even when you rebelled against his wishes, he was proud in a sense. You were showing him you were capable of thinking for yourself. That you can make important decisions and the right ones on your own and without the influence of others the way a king should." Gwen reassured.

"How will I know that I'm being a good king? How can I know the decisions I make are the right ones?" Arthur asked.

"You'll know in your heart if the decision is right. Let your heart and your conscience guide you and you'll do the right thing." Gwen replied. "Besides do you really think we'd let you do something stupid now that you're king?"

For the first time Arthur smiled. "No you wouldn't. But I still don't think I'm ready."

"It's not a question of being ready; it's about facing the challenge head on. I know it's not going to be easy Arthur. We just have to try." Gwen explained.

"You're right but," Arthur trailed off and tears filled his eyes. "It's my fault. If I hadn't tracked down that damn sorcerer…"

"This is not your fault. You thought it was help, that you would save your father. Anyone would do the same. Do you not think I still feel guilty over my father's death? The only reason he helped that man was because he wanted me to have better than what I had. I told him I didn't need anything fancy but he did it anyway. I should have talked him out of helping that man but I didn't." Gwen confessed.

"You didn't know what would happen." Arthur reassured.

"Neither did you." Gwen said.

For a moment they sat in silence and Gwen spent the rest of the night talking to Arthur, consoling his fears and wiping his tears until they both drifted off to sleep. They were still holding onto one another and as the dawn broke, that was how Merlin found them. Both of them were curled up on the bedcovers of Arthur's bed fully dressed. Arthur's head was resting on Gwen's chest and she still had a protective arm around him. Merlin decided it would be better to give his friends some privacy but as he turned the edge of his jacket caught onto something and he fell to the floor, the breakfast tray slipping and falling with a loud crash. Arthur and Gwen shot up on the bed and looked around to see Merlin sheepishly grinning at them from his position on the floor.

"Merlin what on earth are you doing?" Arthur asked as Gwen got off the bed and helped Merlin to his feet.

"Could ask the same about you two." Merlin quipped as Gwen self-consciously attempted to smooth out the creases on her dress.

"I should probably go," Gwen offered and she crossed to the door. Just as she reached the doorway, Arthur called her name and she turned around.

"Guinevere, thank you." Arthur admitted. Gwen smiled warmly at him.

"Anytime Arthur." Gwen smiled and went to quickly get home and change before returning up to the castle. As she walked down the corridor Gwen began musing to herself about how life in Camelot was going to be different now that Arthur was king. She expected there would be a lot of change on the horizon.

"Idiot!"

"Clotpole!"

_CLANG!_

Then again some things just never change.


	9. Marry Your Daughter

_**I'm gonna marry your daughter**_

_**And make her my wife**_

_**I want her to be the only girl that I love for the rest of my life**_

_**I'm gonna marry your princess**_

_**And make her my queen**_

_**She'll be the most beautiful bride that I've ever seen**_

_**I can't wait to smile**_

_**As she walks down the aisle**_

_**On the arm of her father**_

_**On the day that I marry your daughter**_

'_**Marry Your Daughter'-**_**Brian McKnight**

"Hello sir. I-I have to admit I'm a bit nervous about this." Arthur addressed his audience unsurely. This was the most nerve-wracking conversation he'd ever had but the end result was going to be worth it.

"I don't mean that in a bad way. It's just, I've never done this before and I'm still not sure whether this is the right thing to do. I don't mean that in a bad way. I am sure I want to do this but I don't know whether I should be here. Maybe I should have spoken to Elyan or to Gaius instead? But it doesn't feel right that way. I will talk to them but not yet. I needed to speak to you first." Arthur explained as he looked at his target. His hands were shaking slightly and so he clenched his fists before unclenching and taking a breath to calm himself down.

"I never thought I would be having this conversation with you. Sometimes i feel like I don't deserve Guinevere or her love. She loves so greatly and so freely and I'm selfish to demand that all that love be focused on me. What have I done to deserve it? I was arrogant, rude, childish, hot-headed and I guess I still am in a way. I'm clearly not selling myself wonderfully but that's why I love her so much. She was able to look past the titles and see who I was. She was able to find one small aspect of my character which wasn't horrible and brought it to the surface. Her love made me a better man. It still makes me a better man now and I can honestly think of nobody I could love more or who would become a better queen." Arthur hesitated before he continued his monologue, unaware that he was being watched.

"There are so many times when I know I didn't deserve her love. When I was selfish, when I was forced into horrible decisions, when her life was put into danger because of me. Yet time and time again she has stuck by me. Guinevere never gave up on me, even whenever I had given up on myself. Her determination, her compassion and her ability to see the best in me are all factors I have become so dependent on in my life and to lose them would be unthinkable. I love her more than words can say and that is why I'm here now in front of you today. I cannot imagine life without Guinevere and I want her to be my wife. So I'm asking you; do I have your permission and blessing to propose to your daughter?" Arthur asked the mound of earth which formed the blacksmith's grave.

"Yes,"

"Good lord Elyan you scared the life out of me!" Arthur exclaimed as he jumped and turned to see Elyan standing a few feet away from him. Elyan walked toward Arthur and stopped in front of his father's grave. He had seen Arthur heading in the direction of the townspeople's graveyard and had followed out of curiosity. Nobility were generally buried in a separate graveyard from the townspeople and Elyan wondered what had drawn Arthur to that graveyard. Whenever he seen him stop in front of Tom's grave, he knew.

"Do you mean it?" Elyan asked. "You're not going to propose to her and then break her heart by claiming that marrying a servant would be 'inappropriate' for a king?"

Arthur looked at Elyan and realised this wasn't Sir Elyan, knight of Camelot, that he was speaking to. This was Elyan, son of Tom and brother of Guinevere, who he was speaking to. There was a huge difference between the two men and one Arthur hadn't experienced since the 'inappropriate' incident a matter of weeks after he became king.

_Arthur and the knights were returning to Camelot triumphant at securing peace with Queen Annis without having to go to war. Arthur was being hailed as a just and wise king for offering one-on-one combat rather than a bloody battle which would have seen hundreds massacred. As they rested for the evening, Arthur slipped off and looked around. His latest dice against death, not to mention his meeting with Queen Annis, had hit home the importance of having someone to love in his life. Forget what Agravaine said, Arthur loved Guinevere and damn whoever else said it was 'inappropriate'. As Arthur found a small flower blooming freely away from the other plants, he knew it wasn't much but it was the best he would find at this moment in time. _

"_Arthur,"_

_Arthur turned and was immediately shoved against a tree with someone's arm pressing heavily on his throat. As he gasped for breath Arthur looked into the face of his attacker and wasn't surprised that it was Elyan. Arthur was actually expecting this confrontation to have happened earlier but he supposed with the threat of war; it was momentarily side-lined. Within seconds however the other knights and Merlin had joined them and Percival and Leon pulled Elyan away from the king._

"_What is your problem?" Leon asked._

"_It's nothing to do with you, it's between me and him." Elyan replied._

"_What happened?" Gwaine asked._

"_I ended things with Guinevere." Arthur confessed._

"_You what?" the others yelled and began demanding to know why as well reaching for their swords. Arthur noted how quickly they had gone from defending him to supporting Elyan. Merlin who was watching decided to explain._

"_Apparently someone felt Gwen wasn't good enough for him. Personally I think it's the other way around. Either way said someone decided to break her heart before he went to war." Merlin explained. The knights rounded on Arthur looking furious. They all viewed Gwen as a sister and nobody, not even the king, was allowed to hurt their sister and get away with it. _

"_I wasn't thinking; I was being stupid and I plan on making it up to her the second we get back. Elyan I am sorry for what I've done but this is a private matter between myself and Guinevere. I understand your anger but I plan on making things right again. It was a stupid thing to do and I've been beating myself up about it ever since." Arthur stated and the others looked at one another before looking at Elyan. It was his call. Elyan looked at Arthur before he nodded and offered his hand._

"_I'm sorry." Elyan said. Arthur shook his hand._

"_You shouldn't be, you're being a brother. I'm the one who's sorry and just so you know; I would have taken it. The beating I mean." Arthur replied sincerely. He meant it; if all of his knights had lynched him for what he'd done, Arthur would have taken the pain. Because Guinevere was worth any sort of pain. _

"I mean it Elyan. I meant every word I said and I want Guinevere to marry me. I don't care what anyone else says or does; I love your sister and I do want to marry her. That's why I came out here because if your father were still here today, I would have this conversation with him face to face and I would have done the same with you. You're the only two people who could have refused to give me your permission and blessing to do this." Arthur said honestly despite the defiant voice in his head who was loudly claiming that if Elyan refused him this, he would ask anyway.

It seemed Elyan must have heard that voice because his next question was obvious. "And if I refuse, what will you do?"

"I would respect your opinion Elyan but I wouldn't let that stop me. I love your sister too much to lose any chance of even asking her to be my wife. Therefore if you say 'no' then I will just go straight back up to the castle and propose to Guinevere the minute I see her. I wouldn't care who saw or heard me; I'd do it in front of the whole kingdom if I could except I know she hates being the centre of attention like that." Arthur said truthfully. Hell if he had to propose in front of everyone in the five kingdoms he'd damn well do it.

Elyan looked at Arthur before turning back to his father's grave. Arthur stood back and let Elyan speak with his father's grave in private until Elyan turned and walked towards Arthur. Arthur's stomach clenched with nerves and his heart began to pound with adrenaline in his chest. He didn't want Elyan's approval to propose to Guinevere, he needed it. Arthur didn't want to cause a fall-out between him and his potential brother-in-law before he had a chance to ask Guinevere to be his wife. After what felt like an eternity Elyan grinned at Arthur and held out his hand.

"You have our blessing." Elyan said and Arthur grinned as he shook Elyan's hand.

"This means a lot Elyan, not just to me." Arthur said. He knew that Guinevere would want Elyan to be pleased if she and Arthur ever got engaged.

"I know, when are you going to propose?" Elyan asked.

"Tonight," Arthur replied. He had it all planned out. Candlelight, privacy and when the moment was right, he was going to get down on one knee and offer Guinevere the one thing belonging to his mother that he possessed, Ygraine's engagement ring which Uther had given him whenever he felt Arthur was old enough to start considering marriage.

"Who else knows?" Elyan asked.

"Nobody, none of the knights nor my uncle or even Merlin knows I'm doing this. I plan on keeping it that way so can you please not let anyone know. The last thing I want is for this to get out and someone let Guinevere know before tonight." Arthur asked. He didn't want to hear what other people had to think or worse have them offer ideas on how he should propose. Arthur was going to do this his way and without anyone else prying into his private business.

"I promise… brother." Elyan replied as he left the graveyard and Arthur grinned at the last word. While he considered the knights to be his brothers, if all went according to plan Elyan would actually be his brother. As Arthur crossed the graveyard to the small gate, he turned and looked back at Tom's grave and bowed his head.

"Thank you Tom." Arthur said and he hurried out of the graveyard, his mind racing with what he now had to do.


	10. We Belong Together

_**When you left I lost a part of me**_

_**It's still so hard to believe**_

_**Come back baby please**_

_**Because we belong together**_

_**Who am I going to lean on when times are rough?**_

_**Who am I going to talk on the phone to 'til the sun comes up?**_

_**Who's going to take your place?**_

_**There ain't nobody better**_

_**Oh baby baby**_

_**We belong together.**_

'_**We Belong Together'-**_**Mariah Carey**

The battle was over and they had won. Camelot was back in the hands of its rightful king and the people of Camelot were once again beginning to rebuild and recover. However their victory had come at a cost and several good people died heroic deaths for their kingdom. The rest of the day was spent discussing repair work and replacement of crops, treating wounds and preparing the dead for burial. As the night fell and people went to their beds, relived that they could at least sleep in their own beds again; Arthur sat up. He was exhausted from getting barely any sleep the past few days yet he couldn't sleep. The past few days adrenaline had kept him awake, tonight it was his thoughts which kept him up.

The last thing he expected was to see Guinevere again. When he had fled, Arthur had privately believed that was the one good thing about her exile; wherever she was he knew she was safely out of Morgana's reach. Arthur had suspected she may have travelled to Ealdor, Hunith had always welcomed them into her home and as he'd slowly come round, he'd known she was there.

_The first thing Arthur was aware of was the dull throbbing pain in his chest. The second was that he was lying on an uncomfortable bed. The third was the scent of lavender, daisies and honey. _Her_ scent. But that was impossible. Then Arthur could feel the hands tending his painful chest and without opening his eyes, lest he be proven wrong, he focused on them. Rough and calloused skin, small delicate fingers with chewed nails, she always bit them when she was nervous and wait, there it was, the scar on the palm of her left hand caused when she was first learning to use a sword. He knew those hands, he knew that smell, he knew her. The hands moved away and Arthur waited a moment before opening his eyes; still doubtful whether his mind was simply playing tricks. But it wasn't. She was there looking exactly the same. Guinevere. _

Arthur's mind then focused on how he had acted around her as they travelled through the woods back towards Camelot and searching for their fellow knights and friends who had managed to escape. He hadn't meant to be cruel but the events of what had happened, the pain of his uncle's treachery had made him think of her and Lancelot's treachery; the painful memories not to mention his doubts in himself and his ability to be king, his fear for his people and friends and the pressure of what he knew he had to do had caused him to lash out. He hadn't meant what he said; when he claimed their hug in Ealdor was a spur-of-the-moment reaction. In all honesty, he hadn't wanted to let her go.

Another reason for his short-temperedness was her eyes. Up until then there had always been a look of innocence in Guinevere's eyes. A light that none of the hardships and terror that she had faced in her life had been able to extinguish. When he looked into her eyes, it had gone. During her exile, Guinevere had been forced to grow up and leave hopes, dreams and loved ones behind. That had been a benefit in some ways; she was more mature, stronger and wiser now but the knowledge that he had done that; rather than let it happen naturally, he had forced it out of her; that hurt. Seeing the pain in her eyes when he said that, he could see the love and hope flare up once more and he had quenched it simply because he was hurt and wanted others to hurt too. Misery damn well loves company.

It was as he sat in thought that Arthur realised Guinevere didn't have to fight. When she was exiled, they had all turned their backs on her. She had the right, once they were out of Ealdor to turn around and walk back to the village. Goodbye, good luck, hope you win. But she didn't. Guinevere fought and risked her life for the kingdom which turned itself against her. She fought for the man she loved, the brothers who had turned their backs on her and the place she once called home. She had also taken on Morgana in one-on-one combat. That was the biggest risk she had taken. Morgana may not have been able to use her magic and was injured, but she knew she was losing. An angry, scared Morgana was ten times more dangerous than a normal, magical Morgana. But she had managed to survive unscathed while Morgana escaped. She and Merlin had made it back in time to watch Isolde die.

Isolde…

Arthur hated to admit it but it had taken watching Isolde die in Tristan's arms for him to fully realise how stupid he had been acting. If they hadn't joined him and Merlin, Isolde wouldn't have been killed and Tristan would still have the love of his life. The focus throughout the battle had been finding Morgana and defeating her, they were all so determined to be victorious that none of them had even considered the idea of dying. But when Isolde slumped to the floor, her abdomen streaked with blood; the reality of the situation hit them. This was war. People died in war. Isolde was dying. As she and Tristan lamented their dreams which would never come true and as her breath hitched and her pulse slowed; Isolde was fading so fast they couldn't save her. Arthur kept looking at Guinevere who was looking back at him. They didn't say a word but their eyes were doing all the speaking.

_That could have been you._

_Or you._

_I'm so sorry._

_So am I. _

_I still love you._

_I never stopped loving you._

_Am I forgiven?_

_Am I forgiven?_

_**Yes.**_

Arthur knew what he had to do now. There was so much he needed to put right between them. For starters he was repealing that stupid exile. He hadn't wanted to do it in the first place but it was either exile or execution, according to his treacherous uncle of course. There was so much more he had to do, he needed to apologise, he needed to make it up to her and if she would let him, he was going to re-propose. Before he could do all that, Arthur needed to make sure that Guinevere herself was alright. She had agreed to at least spend the night in Camelot but Arthur was going to make sure that if she desired, she would spend every night in Camelot.

Arthur wandered the castle looking for her. She wouldn't be in her old home, another family lived there now. She wasn't down in Gaius' or Merlin's and Arthur headed towards Elyan's chambers. As he approached, the door was slightly ajar. Arthur crept up to it and peered through the small gap. Gwen and Elyan were both lying on his bed, the way they used do as children when Elyan began trashing around on the bed, clearly having a nightmare.

"No! I'll never tell!" Elyan exclaimed before he let out a painful scream. "Stop! Please!"

As Arthur watched, Gwen woke up and immediately sat up on the bed and wrapped her arms around her brother, hugging him and whispering into his ear. Elyan jolted awake and stared wildly about the room as though he expected Morgana to come from a corner and attack him. Gwen continued hugging him as Elyan took a few deep breaths and calmed down.

"Elyan, it's OK. We won remember?" Gwen said.

"I told her, I told her where Arthur and Merlin were. I swear I didn't mean to but it hurt so much. I just wanted it to stop." Elyan explained as he dragged a hand across his eyes.

"It's not your fault. Besides it's over." Gwen reassured and Elyan slowly fell back into sleep. As he drifted off, Gwen hugged her brother and began humming a lullaby that their mother had used to sing to them when they were younger. Arthur turned and walked back to his chambers, he had hoped to talk to Guinevere but it was clear Elyan needed her more than he did.

As the clear up began the next day, Arthur was supervising and delegating tasks, ensuring everyone who wanted to help had a job to do before slipping off to find Guinevere. He found her in his chambers, beginning to clear up the mess Morgana had made when she had taken the room apart trying to find all the documentations she believed she would need as queen. As he walked towards Guinevere, reaching into his pocket for the ring he had found that day in the woods, Arthur took a deep breath. They belonged together and now was the time to prove that nothing would ever change that.


End file.
